19 Waking Quotes About Coffee
Posted on 12th February, 2008 by Albert T.Category: More coffee
I put instant coffee in a microwave and almost went back in time.
- Steven Wright
Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sneeze?
- Jean Kerr
A morning without coffee is like sleep.
- Unknown
If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee.
- Abraham Lincoln
I don’t have a problem with caffeine. I have a problem without caffeine!
- Unknown
Decaffeinated coffee is kind of like kissing your sister.
- Bob Irwin
Don’t drink coffee in the morning. It will keep you awake until noon.
- Unknown
Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat.
- Alex Levine
If it ain’t caffeinated, it ain’t coffee!
- Unknown
I have measured out my life with coffee spoons.
- T. S. Elliot
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
- Unknown
I like my coffee strong, not lethal!
- M*A*S*H
Do I like my coffee black? There are other colors?
- Unknown
I think if I were a woman I’d wear coffee as a perfume.
- John Van Druten
I bought a decaffeinated coffee table, you can’t even see a difference.
- Unknown
Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
- Stephen Wright
Coffee comes in five descending stages: Coffee, Java, Jamoke, Joe, and Carbon Remover.
- Robert A. Heinlein
Behind every successful woman is a substantial amount of coffee.
- Stephanie Piro
I make serious coffee - so strong it wakes up the neighbors.
- Unknown
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February 15th, 2008
“i like my coffee black, just like my metal”
-Mindless Self Indulgence
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February 25th, 2008
“I make serious coffee - so strong it wakes up the neighbors.”
I love this one!
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February 25th, 2008
“I like my coffee like I like my women, hot and strong!” Eddie Izzard
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February 26th, 2008
“If you wanted a cup of cream and sugar, why’d you ask for coffee?”
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February 26th, 2008
“Without coffee, there would be too much blood in my caffeine system.”
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February 27th, 2008
“I like my coffee like I like my women: ground up and in the freezer.”
Hannibal Lecter
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February 28th, 2008
my personal coffee dilema is that i can’t do anything properly before i have had my coffee . . . this includes making my coffee. just this morning i exploded milk in my face trying to make a latte. i have accepted it at this point.
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February 28th, 2008
“I like my coffee like I like my women: black and hot”
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February 29th, 2008
I like my coffee like I like my men: tall, dark and hairy.
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March 2nd, 2008
[...] - Bob Irwin WakeUpVibes [...]
March 4th, 2008
That T. S. Eliot quote is WAYYY out of context.
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March 4th, 2008
I like my coffee to have the bite of a pitt-bull terrier, and so strong that it just about eats through the glass.
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March 6th, 2008
[...] Wake Up Vibes Blog [...]
March 6th, 2008
“Coffee has to be dark like the devil, hot as the hell and sweet as love”
Ukrainian proverb
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March 8th, 2008
These are hilarious! I love the theme of your blog
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March 10th, 2008
Taking decaf is like smoking Rothmans instead of marijuana.
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March 11th, 2008
I DO like my coffee strong… I like coffee just thin enough to drink, but not so thick …that you could think about plowing it!
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March 13th, 2008
[...] 19 Waking Quotes About Coffee Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sneeze? [...]
March 22nd, 2008
i love the quotes on your page, as for me - i love coffee so much that i use it as a nick name online at times ”coffee nut” lol
and i like it strong but not super strong, and i gotta have my sugar and creamer in it (preferably hazelnut creamer)…
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April 14th, 2008
I like my coffee like i like my women,
Ground up and frozen
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June 24th, 2008
Puke - “I like my women like I like my coffee”
Snot - “Hot and black?”
Puke - “Cold and Bitter.”
- Puke and Snot Show.
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July 31st, 2008
I like my coffee so strong that you have to cut it with a knife and fork to get it in your cup. Once in there it walks it’s self over to the sugar bowl, scoops in 2 spoonfuls of sugar. Then stirs it in ’til the spoon melts then threatens you with the handle… daring you to drink it! THAT is good coffee!
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August 14th, 2008
One man: “this coffee tastes like mud”!
Waiter: “Yes Sir…it was just “ground” this Morning”!
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October 14th, 2008
hehe…brilliant! Steven Wright….still right after all these years.
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